Monday, August 22, 2011

The one where I quit my job

So, I quit my job.

Which, if you know me at all in real life, you will know that this is something that I have been talking about for awhile now but could never justify. 

And as much as I have been talking about it for awhile, it was and is and will probably always just barely be something that I truly loved. It provided me an outlook to practice my classroom management and be creative and plan events and just made me happy. It was my baby that I nurtured and it was my safe place. was. 

Some unfortunate things happened. Some sad decisions were mad and I just realized that I wasn't happy anymore. If I'm not happy, I'm not going to be productive and plus, it was just time.

I had been wavering on this decision for awhile and searching high and low for any tiny bit of confidence to slip into a world that was new and boring and a little bit sad.

I knew in my heart that it was 100% time for me to just be an adult and do it when, after a terrible meeting that was just a melting pot of pettiness and unprofessionalism, I return to the office to find one of my kids with severe autism in there having a melt down.

It would be fair to say that all summer, this kid was my project. I believed in him and his family so much but sometimes, situations aren't a good fit and it has nothing to do with us or him but just the way things are.

He was crying and kicking the wall and just a trainwreck of emotions when I walked in and he looked at me, stopped screaming and said "Miss Whitney. I can't do this anymore".

That's it. No crying. No wailing just a simple "I can't do this anymore".

Now, normally it would be my natural reaction to comfort and distract him. Pull out the blocks and push his troubles away until he has forgotten about it.

But I knew it was time to quit my job when, without even thinking about; I said to him "I know honey, me either".

Me either.

So, I quit my job and that's where I am now. 

Stay tuned.