Tuesday, August 31, 2010

On Being Disappointed

This is a blog about a real life situation with a real life person. I hate talking about people who don't know that this blog exists for the simple reason that I would die of shame if they ever found out.

There is someone I go to school with, someone who I considered a really good friend of mine, someone I look up to and admire for working hard to take care of her family and still go to school at night.

But then a few weeks ago, she dropped the bombshell that she is getting a divorce. My heart broke into a million pieces because I don't want her or her kids to hurt. I can't imagine how hard it would be to continue school and deal with this.

Then my heart broke a little more because she told me that the root of this divorce was her new boyfriend.

I felt like I had been punched in the stomach. It wrecked my heart that this person who I adore to the ends of the earth, who I want to grow up and be like, had an affair.

I'm not passing judgment or saying that the divorce is all her fault, I just want to talk about how much it upset me to hear that someone I thought I knew so well could do something like this.

It sucks being disappointed in someone. 

It sucks even more that I have to continue going to school with her and am trapped in a setting where voicing my opinion is not appropriate or welcomed. I want to tell her how let down I am in her. How it drives me crazy that she's not fighting for her family or even stopping to think about what is best for her kids. 

So, that's where I am with this situation. Disappointed and completely let down by her and the universe for letting this happen.

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